Seldom have I had the stuffings scared out of me by something which appears so sinister, right out of a Spectre role in a James Bond film.
Seriously, if these guys do not remind you of the former KGB, you don’t know enough about the KGB.
They also destroy almost any faith I have in the truth in Czechia.
These guys can invent Kompromat. They can invent compromising information. They can tap mobile phones. They will lie for you, help you cheat, and keep your dirty secrets.
They can invent an alibi for you out of thin air, involving nobody in your family, and they advertise that.
Yes, even in the Czech Republic they are considered notorious…
Alibi Ni Míru or Alibi Tailor has a publicly accessible page that advertises just what they do.
Alibi Tailor – the first in the Czech Republic
We are the first and only agency in the Czech Republic to provide a comprehensive service in the field of providing alibi, evidence, testimony and coverage of your arbitrary activities. Alibi has been set up in 2012 to offer professional and discreet services to anyone who wants to live according to their ideas without the risk of being judged and criticized by anyone. Thanks to us you will not have to deal with the unpleasant situation – we will help you prevent them!
In other words, you have the right to work for Russia and not be criticized by anyone. You can beat your wife or your husband and nobody will be the wiser. You can plant evidence in someone’s home and an alibi can be created for you being miles away. Don’t like somebody? Set them up for a trip to a padded cell…
Here is what they advertise:
Main Services Overview:
- BASIC or the basic alibi
Do you need to avoid planning an appointment or visit unplanned? Would you like to get rid of the weekday routine for a few hours and make your life out of the family without having to face tricky questions and remorse? We’ll take care of it. More info
- PHONE RECIPIENT or Remote Assistant
Are you married or married, and are you willing to spend time away from home by deserving rest alone or in a friendly escort? Take advantage of our friend on the phone. More info
- ALIBI LAST MINUTE or five minutes twelve or five minutes after the twelfth
At the last moment, are you looking for the right excuse or needing to explain why you did something you did not do or did not do something you did? We will help you with your privacy and your job. More info
- ALIBI ON MIRACLE or nothing is impossible
Would you like to spend a quiet weekend or on the other hand, have you gone for an exciting vacation to Italy, while maintaining the impression that you are at work in Switzerland? You are successful, you have a happy private and professional life, but you need to plant and take time off for yourself without having to explain where, with whom, and why do you share it? We have the solution right for you. More info
- Are you afraid of the break? SHOULD YOU GO TO YOU
Are you going to make a dot out of a bad relationship and are you afraid of the reaction that will follow? If you want to avoid the surge of excuses and emotional extortion, leave it to us. More info
Is your marriage or relationship full of mismatches, quarrels and conflicts? We will help you to breathe again and enjoy your freedom. Did your son bring home a much older elderly partner or are you trying to get away with your husband computing colleague? We will expel them from their influence and return to your arms. Do you have a businessman in the company and do not know how to get rid of him? Our Distributor is here for you! We also offer a professional seductress or seducer. More info
Other discreet services can be found in the Alibi Menu section.
We are professionals. We keep secrets.
Just above, they mention the Alibi Menu section. Here it is:
- Test your partner to see if they can be seduced.
- Be someplace else, they’ll provide you an alibi.
- The description makes it seem like phone sex.
- Need to be someplace quickly and not let it be known?
- Send friends, relatives, or loves postcards from places to which you’ve never been.
- We can plan an elaborate alibi just for you.
- We can follow anyone
- Cell phone taps.
- Hire an escort.
Who are these fine fellows?
According to their website:
Alibi na míru ® sro
155 21, Praha 5
Company ID: 041 05 621
Company registered by the Municipal Court in Prague, Section C, Entry 242523
Account number: 2500802500/2010
BIC / SWIFT: FIOBCZPPXXX
Tax ID: CZ44854927
They include their bank account information so that you may deposit cash in any Fio Branch and avoid those nasty deposit slips or any other kind of a paper trail.
No, the founder is not ex-KGB, he’s only 42 years old.
I only wonder if they keep all these secrets until somebody is in a position of authority and then whisper into their ear… “Remember that time…”?